I Surrender! I hereby proclaim to all shopping carts across the entire nation in all stores with carts, I Surrender! You Win! Now can I please have some peace? Shopping carts have my number, they have had my number for years and years. Any store I visit, even if there are 50 shopping carts to choose from, and only one has wheels that don’t roll or is bumping repeatedly at the same interval over and over as I’m trying to get to what I’m really there for – that’s the shopping cart I choose every time… I’m telling you, you can’t take me anywhere!

Whatever I did when I was a little kid, the shopping cart Gods didn’t take too kindly to it? I’m wondering, was it when I insisted on riding inside my Mom’s grocery cart as a little kid? Or was it the time I insisted on holding onto the front of her shopping cart as a little bit bigger kid? I did something, whatever it was, shopping cart karma has never let me forget about it.

Now carts see me coming in from the parking lot and they’re like – “Here he comes again, let’s mess with him – watch this!” My suggestion is, don’t be like Brant, Brant’s a shopping cart loser! 😊